writing for this class and beyond

Even though all of the English classes that I've taken have been writing intensive, I feel that the writing I have done for this class has prepared me the best for any writing I will have to do in the future.

This class has taught me how to make important decisions as a writer. We had to choose our own communities, which was an important decision because the remaining of the writing we were assigned to do had to be related to our community. After making that first decision, I also had to make decisions regarding different genres I would write my assignments in, especially for the initiating action assignment. I had to figure out what genre would be the most effective for the argument I was trying to prove (how the most publicized animal rights groups are also the most extreme). I also had to figure out the most effective presentation to convey information to the class.

Being able to effectively make these decisions will help me in future writing because decisions like choosing a genre will always have to be made, no matter what type of writing I will have to do. I feel that becoming better at making these kind of basic "writerly" choices will lead to better writing.

final portfolio

The rough copy of my final portfolio is finished, and even thought it took some time I am actually pretty happy with how it is shaping up. None of my three writing assignments needed too many major revisions, so the bulk of my time was spent on writing the three essays included in the portfolio.

For my introduction to the writer essay, I spent some time reflecting on how my writing has stayed the same and changed between now and high school. I focused on how my writing in high school was mainly fact-based and how the writing I did for this course was more open to creativity and opinion.

For my reflection on the writings essay, I mainly quoted myself, noting the changes I made to the various assignments. I also included why I made those changes and how I felt my writing would improve after making those revisions.

My concluding essay was the most difficult for me to write. I struggled with the question we were supposed to address, which was: "What do I need to know in order to evaluate learnings/progress/effort this semester that this portfolio does not demonstrate?" I think I've decided that for my final portfolio, I would answer that question by talking about how much my time management skills have improved and how I have become better towards making effective writing decisions (like choosing a topic to write about, genre to write it in, etc).

Don't you just love Pittsburgh??

I've been doing some thinking about what newspaper I would like to write my editorial for, and I think I've narrowed it down to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. Not only is it a popular publication that is read by a wide range of people, it also publishes a variety of articles. In addition, I am familiar with the layout since I read it often, which is a plus.

I was originally thinking about writing my editorial for an animal rights publication, but I now realize that wouldn't make much sense because my audience isn't necessarily aimed towards staunch animal rights supporters.

research for my genre

For my initiating action project on animal rights, my genre is going to be an editorial. I did a bit of research and found out some interesting information that I never knew about editorials.

Basically, editorials are a person's views on current events. They aren't news, but rather opinions based on facts. The main reason why an editorial writer writes one in the first place is to express his or her opinions on a fact or hotly debated issue. Generally, editorial writers have a lot of freedom in what they say in their writing, but their finished pieces have to be based on facts, not solely opinions. Also, editorial page editors under each newspaper have the final say before the editorials are published. This is to maintain the newspaper's credibility. Some issues most frequently chosen by editorial writers are concerning politics and elected officials in towns, the environment, and the economy. The editorials I found on the NY Times website weren't any longer or shorter than the average newspaper article.

I think the great thing about editorials is that their writers have freedom to express their opinions. They are not just spitting out facts like regular newspaper articles. Editorial writers are able to interject their ideas in with the facts, making for interesting and thought-provoking reading. Editorials enable their readers to consider both sides of an issue and either disagree or agree with the author.

I think editorials are a refreshing break from the very cut-and-dry world of regular newspaper reporting. They are a great thing to read if you are on the fence about a certain issue.

http://people.howstuffworks.com/newspaper3.htm
http://www.nytimes.com/pages/opinion/

initiating action

In the animal rights community, I feel that a major problem is how animal activists are viewed by the public. A lot of times the public hears the words "animal rights," they think about the extreme fringe of the animal welfare movement. They think of the PETA extremists and the Animal Liberation Front, people that blow up animal research labs, threaten animal researchers, and ask Ben and Jerry's to use human breast milk instead of cow's milk in their ice cream (see one of my old posts!). I believe that this turns the public away from believing in and learning about animal rights.

What I want to prove is that a lot of animal rights organizations are not the fringe extremists that people believe them to be. I feel that writing an editorial is the best way to accomplish this. I plan on using my past research with the an animal rights group here at VT (For the Sake of Animals) to strengthen my argument with their comments on how extreme they think PETA and the Animal Liberation Front really are. My audience will be primarily geared toward people who think that animal activists are extreme, crazy, unjustified, ridiculous, etc. I think writing an editorial will be the most effective way to prove my point by, in a sense, "exposing" the less extreme side of the animal welfare movement.

What many people don't realize is that the majority if animal rights supporters are not crazy and do not condone such violent behavior. It is my hope that people will be able to see this truth through my editorial.

Professor Scott's Feedback

I just got Professor Scott's feedback concerning my essay.

I really liked how the feedback started out positive and then transitioned into what I need to work on during the revision process. She positively commented on my introduction, which I really tried to make personal but also informative in this essay. Her positive feedback encouraged me to try that strategy again in future essays.

I thought the criticism was fair and constructive. In high school, my English teachers would write all over my essays, telling me that this and that was written poorly and needed to be changed. Their comments would leave me confused as to why those problem areas needed to be changed and how I could go about doing it. I thought it was very helpful that Professor Scott included suggestions to help me revise areas that could use some improvement. She also noted how those problem areas left her feeling as a reader, whether it be confused, deceived, etc. I'm glad I have her feedback and after re-reading those problem sections, I can now see why she feels that way. I'll definitely be using her revision suggestions.

In future writing, I'll be sure to try and avoid doing what I did wrong in this essay. I'll try to keep each body paragraph balanced and make an effort to keep including transitions that aren't too blunt but keep the writing organized. ( I was really conscious of that in this essay).

Essay Feedback

This is just in response to the essay classmate feedback assignment (the letter). I'd just like to say how helpful I thought it was! (Thanks for your feedback Angie!)

Normally the only person that revises my essays is myself, and sometimes that isn't the most effective revision process. Sometimes I miss things, don't realize I'm making a confusing point, etc etc. Having another classmate review what I had written was a huge help, it gave me another perspective and new ideas to consider. It was also a confidence boost to see that another person thought I did a few things well. I also liked the letter format. The letter made everything seem more personal. I also think revising other student's work was a helpful exercise. It taught me what to look for in strong essays, and how important a clear purpose is throughout the essay. It also was great practice in giving constructive criticism.

I think my final essay is a lot better now after receiving the feedback than it would have been without doing this assignment.

What is a good essay?

Since there is no clear cut definition of what an essay truly is, I think strong essays can be many things. Depending on the subject, they can be personal or formal, long or short, detailed or concise, funny or serious, informative or persuasive.

I feel that a good essay isn't so much about how it's written, it's more about how much the author cares about the topic. I think that if the essayist is deeply interested in or cares about his/her topic, a good essay will be the end product of the writing process. An author that is not interested in writing about a certain subject will produce an essay that isn't thought provoking or interesting. I really feel that the author has to be invested in the essay topic. Essays written by interested authors will usually either make the reader think, paint a vivid picture, persuade the reader, or just keep the audience interested.

I think my essay needs a more personal feel. I feel like there are a lot of opportunities for creativity with the certain subject I'm writing this essay about (animal rights, more specifically, vegetarianism). Since I am a vegetarian myself, I can add personal experiences, or things I have observed since taking up this lifestyle. I want to keep my audience (meat-eaters) interested and compelled to read more. I think this can be accomplished by adding facts and certain figures from my research. I'm not necessarily trying to persuade all the meat-eaters of the world to never eat meat again (although that would be awesome), I'm just trying to inform them of a topic that I care about and am interested in.

Feedback

I just finished reading Professor Scott's feedback to my research proposal. First off, I think the layout of the feedback was really helpful. Instead of just a big long paragraph explaining my strengths and weaknesses, the comments on the side of what I wrote in the proposal pinpointed specific problem areas and strengths. I think that will be a great and helpful tool when it comes time to revise.

I also thought Professor Scott gave a nice balance of comments concerning what I did well and what could use some improvement. When I finished reading her comments, I was satisfied with the job I did and confident that I could sufficiently revise some problem areas. If the comments were too positive, I wouldn't know what to revise for the final portfolio. However, if the comments were all negative, I would feel like I didn't do a good enough job and be tempted to just try and write the whole thing over.

I also thought her comments were accurate. She agreed with me as to what area I thought could use some more work (project methodology). I will be sure to give that section extra revising for the final portfolio.

Weekly Blog

Using the class blog for a little bit of inspiration, I decided to focus this week's blog on the question: "What important decisions do writers make when they approaching a writing task?"

I think one of the most important decisions is simple: deciding what to write about. However, this goes far beyond just selecting a topic. It is about choosing a topic that interests you, a topic that you know something about, and a topic that can be written about clearly. I think a sign of weak writing is straying from the purpose, so the writer needs to have a focused, clear topic/purpose before he starts to write.

I also believe another decision writers make is how they should write (their style). Should it be persuasive? Informative? Informal? Formal? The tone of the writing impacts the way the audience views the work. An essay about the serious health effects of smoking, for example, should be approached informatively, with a serious tone. If the essay was written informally, using lots of informal words and sarcasm, the audience wouldn't walk away from the essay the same way they would have had it been written formally. Writers consistently need to keep in mind who their audience is throughout the whole writing process.

Essays

Before responding to the essays we were assigned to read, I would just like to define what I think an essay is. From past English classes and writing experience, I believe that an essay is a succinct, yet detailed piece of writing which conveys some sort of experience, emotion, or point of view. I feel that an essayist writes an essay not to prove something or force an idea on someone, but to simply elaborate on some sort of issue or event that he/she feels strongly about. For that reason an essay can get quite emotional. Not exactly a Merriam-Webster type definition, but I think it'll do.

"The Stunt Pilot"- I think this is a strong essay for a few reasons. First, it is artfully detailed without being too long. From my experience, essays are never very long yet still use detail to keep the reader's interest. I found Dillard's description of the way Rahm flew a plane: "Rahm did everything his plane could do: tailspins, four-point rolls, flat spins, figure eights, snap rolls, and hammerheads. He did pirouettes on the plane's tail. The other pilots could do these stunts too, skillfully, one at a time. But Rahm used the plane inexhaustibly, like a brush marking thin air" (169). Dillard uses techniques like similes (like a brush marking thin air) to paint a vivid picture in the reader's mind of what the plane looks like soaring through the air.

I also think this is an effective essay because it is emotional. It is difficult to write a strong essay if you do not feel passionate or at least interested in the subject. Dillard seems truly emotionally invested in the subject of her essay. She was inspired and in a way almost mystified at the artistic beauty of Rahm's flying. She was also affected by Rahm's death and made her appreciate the quality of his flying even more.

"Ali in Havana"- I believe this to also be a strong essay. Obviously, the evidence of carefully chosen detail is quite obvious. He is able to create a character's personality and quirks in just a few sentences: "Ed Bradley is a gracious but reserved individualist who has appeared on television for a decade with his left earlobe pierced by a small circular ring -- which, after some unfavorable comment initially expressed by his colleagues Mike Wallace and Andy Rooney, prompted Bradley's explanation: 'It's my ear' (268). From this sentence alone we get a visual picture of Ed, as well as stubborn, "it's-my-life" kind of attitude.

Also, this event must have affected Talese in some way, be it the awkward humor or the tension of this odd situation. Talese is not trying to push a certain idea or way of thinking on his audience. Instead, he is simply sharing this experience with his reader. He does this effectively by using detail and conveying emotion.

Unfortunately I was not able to read "Silent Dancing." For some reason, as stated on the course blog, it would not show up on my computer. I tried it on my roommate's computer as well, but I didn't get anything there either.

Group workshop

I thought the group workshop process last Friday was very helpful. I thought it as interesting to hear what the other group members decided to research. Dentistry, aviation, and show jumping were some of the diverse topics that we talked about.

I think my group moved really effectively out of the "I'm too polite and don't know you well enough to give you constructive criticism" stage that we all know too well. That stage is not only awkward, but makes group work a waste of time because everyone is not concerned enough with the quality of writing. Our group not only gave each other constructive criticism on issues like the audience and effective research methodology, but also praised each other on things we did well.

I think a way to make the next workshop even better would be to maybe create a check sheet of criteria that the piece of writing we are evaluating should have. That way, each group member could work down the list and see if the writing they are evaluating meets the important criteria. But all in all, the feedback I received helped me out quite a lot!

Debate time

As I write this I am watching the presidential debate. I have to say I never closely watched debates from past elections, and if I did watch them it was only for school or at the begging of my parents.

I'm happy to say that this year though, I have been watching the debates enthusiastically. I am surprised at how much I actually enjoy watching them. I suppose this is because I am able to vote this year, and I want to fully understand the views of both candidates.

I'm also proud to mention that I am a HUGE McCain fan! He will be getting my vote (and I would vote for him twice if I could) on the fourth.

The only issue is that my roommate is an Obama supporter. And I have to say the looks she gives me when I criticize Obama's points during this debate are pretty awkward...

Question for you readers: McCain or Obama? feel free to comment =)

PS: My proposal is done! I submitted it to Professor Scott and she received it free of technological issues! (thankfully)

Honestly, I am really happy with how the final copy of my proposal turned out. I think I was clear with what I wanted out of the research, and I also think I was able to create an informative and effective background to my proposed research. I think a helpful exercise was one we did in class last week, when we listed all of the qualities we thought were in an effective research proposal. I definitely had those in mind as I wrote mine!

One struggle I encountered, however, was the research methodology. I found it difficult to decide how much detail to include about how to carry out the proposed research. I ended up detailing what kind of questions were in my research surveys and who I would send each survey to.

Proposals

I'm just about finished on the final copy of my research proposal. I am actually quite happy with it! I was surprised at how easily ideas came to me, I guess it's because I was writing about a topic that really interests me. Today I had my conference, and I think it went well. I cleared up a few issues that I was having trouble with, like writing an effective conclusion for the proposal. I learned that in the conclusion, a question you could answer is "in the future, what could be done with the results of this study?"

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

Research proposals and sorbet...

I'm just about done writing the rough draft of my research proposal. I started one on Monday but I wasn't really happy with it so I erased that one and started a new one. Thankfully I haven't had many problems writing the new draft, I was actually surprised at how easy ideas came to me.

Some food news: On a totally irrelevant note, during my Walmart outing this weekend I bought some mango sorbet, and I think it is the best thing ever. Anyone agree?

Literature Review

I'm not sure if I did this entirely correctly but here it is!

Most people, in one way or another, contribute to animal exploitation. Whether it’s by consuming meat, wearing a leather belt, or spending a day at the zoo, millions of animals are used and abused by humans, many times indirectly, every single day. This enormous problem isn’t exclusively caused by pet abusers or factory farmers. Much of the time, the main contributors to the problem are normal people living normal lives. Why else would the meat industry make billions of dollars each other? Why else would circuses and petting zoos stay in business? It’s because they make their money off of people who do not know any better than to give their money to these organizations. Circuses, for example, are publicly viewed as wholesome sources of family fun; the abuse that goes on behind the glittering stage and flashing lights is not widely acknowledged. And few people other than animal rights activists know the gruesome truth of what goes on in slaughterhouses and factory farms. Animal ethicist Bernard E. Rollin notes that “if you showed the average person where their bacon comes from, he or she probably wouldn’t eat it!” The main reason behind the massive problem of animal exploitation is simply the lack of knowledge about the issue throughout the general public. The following two literature reviews demonstrate and further explain this point.

In Catharine Grant’s The No-Nonsense Guide to Animal Rights, she focuses on describing the different forms of animal abuse: animals used for food, entertainment, clothing, and science. She details, sometimes very graphically, the reality of these industries. Her purpose is to inform the reader of how animals are exploited and abused every day by average Americans. She notes that animal abuse is sometimes direct, such as when an animal trainer at the circus beats his elephants in order for them to perform. But more often than not, normal people support these industries by buying meat, going to see animals in zoos, circuses, and aquariums, and wearing animal products like fur and leather. She acknowledges the fact that the general public doesn’t fully understand the scope of animal abuse. Because of this, she includes a “practical guide to reduce animal suffering” at the end of her book. However, her views on reducing animal suffering never reach the radical standpoint. They are, in her own words, “practical”, and include not consuming meat every day, buying free-range products, and wearing fake fur or leather. As a result, her words do not come off as overly pushy or extreme. The book explains the key issues of animal abuse without sounding condescending or chastising the public. Her goal is to inform, not to be pushy and shocking.

Bernard E. Rollin’s Animal Rights & Human Morality also accomplishes similar goals. Rollin stresses ethical, responsible living, which is not cutting animals entirely out of one’s life, but is rather being informed of what goes in the various animal industries. He is not condescending or harsh when he presents the reality of animal abuse. His relaxed but matter-of-fact tone effectively describes the problem without overdoing it. Rollin’s detailed research, especially in the areas of animals used for science and agriculture, is fascinating yet harrowing to read. Like Grant, Rollin wants to present the problem of animal exploitation so the public is more informed. He realizes the fact that many Americans simply do not realize what goes on in the animal industries and continue to support their cruelty. An interesting topic he writes about in detail is the differences between humans and animals and whether those differences justify a moral difference. In other words, just because humans are more “civilized” and intelligent than animals, does that really make it justifiable for us to use them for our benefit? He plays the devil’s advocate role well, and consequently analyzes both sides of the issue, which is informative and interesting.

Even though animal abuse is more prevalent than ever before, many Americans simply do not know enough about it to stop contributing to the industries responsible. Both Grant and Rollin demonstrate, however, that with a little information, it is easy for people to make humane decisions without dramatically changing their lifestyle.

Grant, Catherine. The No-Nonsense Guide to Animal Rights. UK: New Internationalist Publications Ltd

2006.

Rollin, Bernard E. Animal Rights & Human Morality. 3^rd ed. Amherst: Prometheus Books, 2006.

Got Milk?

So did anyone else hear about the letter PETA wrote to Ben and Jerry's ice cream company? Totally ridiculous. The letter asked the company to use HUMAN breast milk instead of cow's milk in its ice cream.

I love cows as much as the next person, but this is a little extreme. In a press release, PETA makes the claim that dairy cows are horribly abused and the milking process is unnatural and painful. However, they neglect to provide any concrete facts or eye witness accounts of this abuse. It seems to me that PETA just likes news coverage and aims to shock the public into donating money.

I don't know about you, but I definitely prefer my Ben and Jerry's with cow's milk.

Site Visit and Interview

This past Tuesday I attended the first For the Sake of Animals (FSA) meeting of the year at Squires. The first thing I noticed about the group was how friendly and welcoming everybody was. It wasn't a large meeting, there were only about eight people there including myself, but the small atmosphere was actually very comfortable and personable. Everyone immediately introduced themselves and seemed genuinely interested in wanting to get to know me. They asked where I was from, what I did for fun, whether or not I was a vegan (I'm not), and so on. Even though I was the only non-vegan and the only freshman, I didn't feel awkward at all talking to the group. They were all very welcoming.

After the meeting I met with the girl I was interviewing, and I was happy to see that she was enthusiastic about giving her opinions. I didn't feel like I was holding her back from something more important; it seemed that she really wanted to be there and answer my questions. Some other members of the group even stayed back to listen and give me their own opinions to the questions after the formal interview was over. I got a lot of great input that I plan to use as I get to know this particular community better.

I'm really looking forward to working with this group as the year goes on. There are a lot of great activities planned that I can't wait to get involved in. And who knows, I might even give the vegan thing a try............maybe.

Course Goals

1.) I want to be able to write better conclusions. Usually by the end of my papers I don't have any ideas left and my conclusions can be kind of bland and wordy.

2.) Another goal I have is to be able to write descriptively without being too wordy.

3.) The last goal I have is to become more organized throughout the writing process. Usually I don't prepare first and second drafts; I usually just write one and edit it along the way. I would like to improve my writing by creating multiple drafts and thorougly editing them.

Interview Questions

1. How long have you been interested in animal rights?

2. Some critics question animal rights supporters because there are so many human rights issues they feel need to be addressed. So why do you choose to support animal rights?

3. How do you feel about zoos and circuses that claim to be "educating" people about wildlife?

4. What specific animal rights issues are you most concerned about?

5. How long do you think it will take for animals to be treated better by society?

6. What laws should be put in place to help animals?

7. What specific things have you done to help the animal rights movement?

8. How do you feel about PETA and their radical views?

9. What is the most important thing people can do to help animals?

Better Late Than Never...

Oops, I didn't realize we had to post our observations on our blogs for today. I'll do that now...

I observed two girls on my floor for this assignment. It was on Sunday night, at about 8:00. Wearing workout clothes, their hair in ponytails, they were sitting and working on homework on a couch in the center of our hall in West AJ. I sat down across from them and started "typing on my laptop" while I observed them. The first thing I noted was that it seemed like the girls knew each other from other circumstances besides school because most of the 20 minutes or so that I observed them they were laughing and talking, not really paying attention to their work. Most of the time, the atmosphere was filled with their laughter except for the few brief periods of silence when they were writing or flipping through text books. They mostly talked about the football game, what they did the past weekend, and how much homework they had. The taller of the two girls made fun of the shorter girls tan lines and they each commented that they should go tanning together. They glanced at me, and after a brief awkward eye contact and even more awkward silence, they continued to talk and I got my things and headed back to my dorm.

Class Reflections

In class on Friday, my group and I discussed our answers to the various questions in the reading. We talked a lot about how we know things are essentially true. Mainly we said that books, authority figures, and even the media validate statements and make them true. We all agreed that subjects like math only have one "truth" or right answer that cannot be altered. However, we said that in many other areas, truth can be changed according to the situation and differing opinions.

I think the fact that truth can be discussed and that there are different answers to different questions in the world makes life interesting. Knowing that there could be another answer and another possibility causes life to stray off of the everyday, normal path.

I also think that these points can relate to my community, supporters of animal rights. Strict supporters of animal rights could think that the only truth is that no one should eat meat, wear fur, or etc. People that do not support animal rights could find that statement to be completely false and think that animals are meant for human use. It is all a matter of opinion. I am looking forward to hearing the opinions of others on this topic.

Narrowing It Down

So far I have narrowed it down to two communities that I am particularly interested in for this project: long distance runners and supporters of animal rights. There is an off campus group called Blacksburg Striders that focuses on long distance running that I could research. On campus, however, there is an animal rights group called For the Sake of Animals that I am interested in learning more about. FSA has the potential to be a good community for this project because there are a lot of animal rights issues that I could research and explore further. I'll have to make a decision by tomorrow!!

Communities I'm In

• Dave Matthews fans
• Hokies
• ex TJ Maxx employees
• high school graduates
• long distance runners
• Pittsburghers
• Steelers fans
• Penguins hockey fans

First post...

Hi everyone, I've never blogged before and I don't really know how to make this interesting, but we'll see if I have anything at least mildly entertaining to say later.